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Writer's pictureNasreen Allen

Unleashing Your Voice: Speaking Up, Setting Boundaries, and Finding Peace



love your voice

Have you ever felt hesitant to express your desires or struggled to maintain healthy boundaries? This is a common experience, especially for women. Let's explore ways to confidently voice your needs, set clear boundaries, and ultimately find greater peace and self-care.


Finding Your Voice:

Start small. Instead of asking your partner, "Do you want to...?" rephrase it as "I want..." This simple shift can empower you to express your desires more assertively. ("Do you want to eat tacos for dinner?" vs "I want to eat tacos for dinner.") This simple shift has improved my communication with my spouse.


Letting Go of Judgment Fear:

Remember, "What others think of me is none of my business." You can't control their thoughts, but you can control your actions and communication. Embrace this mantra when voicing desires or setting boundaries.


Building Healthy Boundaries:

Start with small boundaries, like limiting social media time. For others, it could be politely saying, "Please let me shower in peace." Be consistent in enforcing your boundaries, and remember, it's okay to remind yourself or others of them; it's the only way they stick.


Direct Communication is Key:

Don't expect people to read your mind. Instead, clearly state your needs, like asking, "Will you wash the dishes?" This direct approach avoids passive-aggressiveness and fosters healthy communication.


Practice Makes Progress:

Building confidence takes time and practice. Celebrate your small triumphs, knowing they pave the way for bigger asks and a more peaceful you.


Additional Tips:

  • Seek support from a trusted friend or online community.

  • Utilize "I" statements to communicate assertively without blaming.

  • Practice self-compassion and celebrate your progress along the way.


By mastering your voice and setting healthy boundaries, you can create a life filled with greater confidence, self-respect, and peace of mind. Remember, you deserve to be heard and respected, and your voice matters.


***When you're in a particularly vulnerable state, like the act of giving birth, it's important to have your voice and a plan prior to being in labor. Educate yourself ahead of time on all possible paths your birth may go and have someone you know will advocate ask for you, like a partner or doula.


Here's to your voice!


Nasreen xx

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